I finally had the courage to write about this. August 2014, I was suffering from Non-epileptic seizures so, after an examination, the consultant decided to induce at 38 weeks. I was admitted to Basildon University Hospital’s maternity ward. 

They started the procedure on 13th August with a pill instead of gel and fluid. within 2 hours contractions started but I was not dilating. 6 hours later, the contractions stopped completely. it was past midnight so they gave me something to sleep. 

The following morning, I felt that the baby had moved. I told 2 nurses and their responses were “babies don’t move at this stage”. Without an examination, another midwife came in and inserted another pill you know where. It was 9am. Just the way she was fighting to put the pill close to the cervix, I told my husband something wasn’t right. 

Contractions started again around 12pm and stopped on at 4pm. At 8pm the room and took me into a delivery suite. Again at that point, I told the nurse the I felt the baby had moved, again they ignored me and proceeded to break my waters again without examining me first. Because of the risk of passing out or having a fit, I had to have an epidural. 

Within minutes contraction started and was within 2 to 3 minutes. Gas in air was no longer effective at that point and despite having epidural, I could feel the pain on one leg. After 2 hours the midwife then decided to examine me. 

Then we just heard an ” I need to get a consultant, I will be right back”. The consultant came in with a scan, Kayleigh was breached and her legs were first. I needed an emergency C- Section. So more local anesthetic on my back, There was this vibe in the theatre between nurses and surgeon, they were not very happy with each other, anyway they proceeded and within minutes Kayleigh was born.

Darren (my husband) was by my side but after Kayleigh was born, Instead of him going to take Kayleigh he stayed by my side. Kayleigh was crying so I kept saying “Honey go and get milk for the baby”. He refused. I was getting very cold, I told the nurses and they brought a warm air blanket but I was still cold and was getting dizzy. What I couldn’t see was that I was losing a lot of blood and Darren could see that.

Next thing there were so many surgeons in the theatre and I heard “Get the husband out”. Darren refused until a lovely Healthcare Assistant told him,” I will stay with her don’t worry”. She held my hand and was praying for me. 
It was around 2.15 am on 15th August, the last thing I remember was Darren being taken out. When I opened my eyes it was 5.30am.
I had haemorrhaged and lost 6 units of blood. But Kayleigh was healthy and in good health. When they took me out to clean me, I saw Darren’s face. He was clearly upset and had been crying. He kissed me and said ” I love you” followed by “No more” :-).
At that point, we thought that was it. I was encouraged to speak to PALS, which I did. I was also advised to take legal actions against the hospital for medical negligence. But at the time it was too upsetting to talk about the whole thing so I let it pass.
After a few months, I started experiencing pains on my lower abdomen but we put it down to possible fibroids and the wound just healing.
It has been over 4 years, and every day over the past 4 years, I cannot remember a day I was not in pain. Obviously, pains bringing fatigue and so much more. I am just blessed to have my family and friends holding my hand.
Mostly Darren and Grace our first daughter. When they ask you at the hospital: on a scale of 1-10 how bad is your pain? mine is always at 6-7 at worse 10 then I start to pass out. I don’t always tell my husband when that happens, he worries too much and would take days off to stay at home. 
I have had several diagnoses: Adhesions, Adenomyosis, Endometriosis, Fibroids, Polycystic ovaries, Kidney stones, nothing wrong with you, Pelvic Inflammation Disease …
2 years ago my GP Dr. Long, who has been absolutely amazing and God knows how all this would have turned out if I was in an area where GPs don’t care. He said that he suspected nerves damage after the C- Section but it was still worth investigating.
In the past 2 years I have had a total abdominal hysterectomy, a laparoscopic surgery to remove adhesions, a cystoscopy and an endoscopy countless scans, MRIs and CT scans, blood test. All clear. 
It has now been concluded that It is nerves damage. I now have to wait months to be treated by the same institution that caused this in the first place, the NHS! 
This is the first time in over 4 years I am writing about this. I wouldn’t say that my life is ruined because I have never let this take over my life.  
I have medications which allow me to sleep more comfortably, a career that keeps my had busy, 

Kayleigh is such a loving and caring child. At 4 years old, I sometimes think that she knows what I go through. 

Every morning and every single night before she goes to sleep, Kayleigh will say ” You’re are the best mum ever” and “You are beautiful mum”. on days when I am not well, she cuddles up to me and would keep kissing me as if that would make me feel better and in a way it does. She is so funny and smart at the same time and sometime a bit too smart for her own good.

Today, I was in so much pain that i struggled to focus on anything. In the evening I had to drop off and pick up Grace for her Gymnastics session. And I almost had an accident twice. The second one was the worst one because another family was going to be involved. 

As much as I don’t let this situation get to me, tonight it did. 

My Top Tips

  1. C-Section can be safe, but if you only elected for it to avoid the pain of pushing a baby, it’s not worth it, try natural birth. 
  2. If something goes wrong and you have guts feelings telling you to check again, speak up and insist to be examined before further actions.
  3. If you are told a hysterectomy is the only option, go get a second and third opinion.
  4. If you are advised to take legal actions for medical negligence, do it. Because today I wish i did. Maybe it would even help the hospital implement new practices. 
  5. Ask for help when you need it, it doesn’t hurt.
  6. If you are having pelvic pains, ask to see a specialist and keep asking until they hear you. 

7. If you have abdominal pains, invest in a heat pad. It is absolutely amazing. I seriously don’t know what I would do without it. 

8. Drink plenty of fluid but stop drinking at 6pm. if you drink before you go to bed, you will keep waking up for the toilette. 

Last but not least for those who are suffering from chronic abdominal pains, do something that makes you happy. You are already in crazy amount of pain so don’t kill yourself doing things that don’t even make you happy. 

Maybe in my next blogpost, I will share how I live with Chronic Abdominal pains and how it affects my life. 

This post is not to scare pregnant mums but to bring awareness about other risks involved when voluntarily electing for Cesarean Section. There are some scars that are not necessarily visible to the nacked eye. 


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